When I was very young I recall with clarity a moment in time where I saw the world I wanted and inhabited at the same time as I saw the world the world wanted me to see and live.
I was clear in that moment that I was being asked to fit into a certain shape. To not do this, and to do that. And that the shape felt very wrong.
I had picked up a dead bird by the road side, freshly dead and crawling with ants. I was told it was dirty, and to put it down. All I wanted to do was to hold it and keep it warm. To love this bird one soft animal to another. To not discard it and leave it abandoned by the road side.
The window of my whole life opened at that moment, and I knew that there would be 1 million inflection points where I would be invited to choose between the life I was told to choose, and the one that called to me. It was as if I knew that children are born with infinite wisdom and then shaped into lesser beings. Don’t we all know this?
I chose to fight with all my might to resist losing my innate capacity to stay connected to the exquisite knowing of innocence and purity.
Did I win this fight in totality? Most likely not. But I do know that I knew I had a choice from a very early age, and that my default was to choose the path of my soul/Source.
Now in my middle years, I see that my constancy of choice is a rare thing. One few people make. As I was watching for the second time my dear friend David Martin’s film, Future Dreaming, I saw myself. I saw the commitment to say yes to my soul/Source and no to all the temptations that distract us from our blessed work in the world. And while the path has not been easy, it has been the path I chose with steadfast commitment.
You most probably remember the time you sold out. The first moment when you shut a part of you down in order to fit in, be nice, be liked?
It is never too late. Today you can choose again. This time for best of you. For all that you have yearned to be. It is in truth, the only way to be alive.